Reasons Why I Need to Write

1.  God

I have always enjoyed writing, but up until I was twenty-five everything I wrote was for class assignments.  It wasn’t until Randall deployed for the second time that I realized the kind of writing I enjoyed the most—inspirational writing.  In the midst of grieving my husband’s absence, I would come across a quote or bible verse, or hear a song on the radio that would somehow apply to my life and would encourage me to think positively about my circumstances.  I began to write short essays based on these inspirations and how they helped me get through the tough times.  I e-mailed these essays to my closest family members and posted them under my notes on Facebook.  I was not expecting the number of people I would reach and how much others would enjoy my words.  I soon realized that my desire and ability to write is a gift, a special talent I can share with others.  Through writing, I can take what inspires me and reach out to other people who may be going through similar difficulties.  Since I began writing the essays, I have continually felt something pulling me to keep writing, to make it something more permanent.  My problem, though, was not knowing exactly what I wanted to write about.  I knew I wanted to inspire, but I couldn’t figure out if I wanted the inspiration to come from my experiences as a military wife, my passion for being healthy, what I have learned about making a marriage great, or the trials and tribulations of motherhood.  For a few years, I quietly contemplated and listened for that voice, the one telling me to write, for an answer.  I knew who’s voice it was, and I wanted to make sure I listened closely so I would get it right.  One day, when I was tired of feeling a loss of identity from being a stay-home mom, I decided that I was going to create a job for myself.  My job would be to write.  My writing would be directed towards military wives.  I would write to inspire them to embrace the lifestyle upon which they have embarked.  After my decision, I immediately felt a sense of ease come over me and I knew I had heard the right answer.  Why it took so long to hear, I do not know.  But God has his plans.  He finally spoke, and I listened.   

2. To share what I have learned through my experiences

    Military wives share many similarities in what they must deal with in their lives, but every wife’s interpretations are different.  We interpret the events in our lives based on our feelings, fears, beliefs, values, past events, and the list goes on.  Two wives whose husbands are going on the same deployment are experiencing the same situation, but will interpret it differently based on the individual variables in each one’s life.  There will always be a wife who is moving along just fine at the same time as another wife is struggling.  I think it is extremely important that military wives share their experiences and interpretations with other wives.  By learning how other women deal with similar circumstances, we can build on what we already know and become stronger as a result.  As women, it is easy to appear strong on the outside but be torn apart on the inside.  Chances are someone we know has been in the same boat and has gotten through it.  I have been so blessed with the nature of my circumstances thus far in that none of them have been debilitating, but there have been several times when I was greatly discouraged and in need of a helping hand. I am hoping that I can use my experiences to lend a hand to someone else who may need it.

3. To share the things that inspire and encourage me

Since I was a little girl, I have had a genuine ability to seek out what is positive in the world.  Perhaps it is a spiritual gift, or it could simply be part of my genes.  I remember in high school other kids would get annoyed with me because they wanted to be negative and I tried to point out the positive point of view.  (I can’t imagine how today’s teenagers would react to that!)  But I didn’t let them get me down.  It made me feel good to stay positive and no one was going to stop me.  Fast forward to the world of adulthood and responsibility, I started to become negative.  Life really is hard!  After a while of disappointing myself with the amount of negativity running through my head, I decided I needed to find the positive again.  The group of women I hung out with started a bible study which enabled me to see that the bible is an excellent manual for those looking for encouragement.  I found several verses that spoke to me and helped me keep my head up.  I also received a gift from a good friend made up of cards with verses and quotes on them for each week my husband was deployed.  This gave me something to focus on each week and help me stay positive through the deployment.  I also have found that certain songs will motivate me to stay optimistic, so I try to listen to music when I am feeling low.  Everyone has their own list of things which inspire and encourage them to keep moving on.  By sharing my own, I feel like I can make a positive difference in people’s lives.  I have heard it said that smiles are contagious.  I am hoping that positive energy is contagious too, no matter how much misery loves company. 

4. Therapy

A few days ago, something very exciting occurred to me.  I have been writing this blog for six weeks, and for six weeks I have been sleeping better (I haven’t slept well for four years!), have experienced less anxiety, have been able to stay focused on the positive side of things, and the feeling of a loss of identity has diminished tremendously.  I think part of it is that I simply don’t have time to think about everything that bothers me because I’m too busy writing!  But it is also my therapy.  When I am writing, I am calm.  I am thinking clearly.  I am trying to find ways to inspire others, and end up inspiring myself while I’m doing it.  If writing ends up being a career for me, then I will have one happy life because it will be like getting paid to meditate!  I do hope to have a writing career someday, but for now this blog lends me enough to work on.  If I touch even one person’s life with my words, then I am happy, and happiness is nature’s medicine.  To all of my readers who have commented and expressed how my writing has helped you, thank you!  You, in turn, have helped me more than you know!